I turned nineteen today. All in all, it was a pretty good day. I got a necklace and earring set from Freek Show, a gas card and kickass pair of clogs from my father and mother, and fifteen dollars from my grandparents, not to mention many wishes of a happy birthday from friends. Plus, I got a dinner at my parents' house, which consisted of steak, sauteed mushrooms and onions, brussels sprouts, green beans, twice baked potatoes, and for dessert, angel food cake with strawberries. Mmm. That's it for now, though. Au revior!

I was concieved. *gasp*

I'm getting old. Tomorrow, I turn nineteen. God help us all. Hehehe. ^^

This is a pretty pointless entry.

Oh, I metish a boy. His name....will be....Wicked. He's...pretty much awesome. And lives in a different state. Sad. Lolz...Anyway...I talked to him for, oh, twoish hours yesterday...the day before? And four and a half today//last night. Hehehe. Yep. I know nothing romantic will happen, but it's nice to flirt with someone and know that, by some stroke of miracle, someone finds me worth flirting with and intelligent and is also intelligent and yeah. Anyways.

Umm that's about it for now. I'm going to go rape my father's cupboards and see if I can find some cereal to mow on. THANKS A FUCKING LOT, SWEETIE PIE! Lolz

M'kay so this bit's for my watchers that don't know me irl (or the ones that do, and also read my stories):

More to come, soon hopefully, with Dani and October, as well as Wolf and Liah. I'm so sorry this took so long, but I've been busy//distracted lately. Also, I'll try to write the next Jiselle adventure. If there are any character ideas or story ideas you'd like me to pursue, let me know, I'll try to run with it and put it up as soon as I can. =]

And now, the irlifers//people who actually read what goes on in my life !

I'm getting...a shrink. I may already have stated this, if I did, sorry I didn't mean to be repetitive! And, I got my progress notes//intake sheet//plan//discharge sheet from the FIRST//LAST shrink I had. Good god his writing is atrocious! Some of the stuff made me laugh, some of it made me sad, but most of all, I regret not taking advantage of my therapist. So, some advice: if you have a shrink, therapist, psychologist, psychiatrist, whatever, UTILIZE THEM to the FULLEST EXTENT. Maybe, if I had done that three years ago, I wouldn't have ended up quite as fucked up as I am.

Advice on shrinks, though: if you are a minor, especially, watch what you say. This was one reason I didn't really talk to Buda. If you say anything about sexual abuse, physical abuse, illegal drug use, or that you imbue large quantities of alcohol often, they are required BY LAW to report it to someone. The abuse, to the police. Drugs probably coppers and parents. Alcohol, I think, just parental units. Most of what you say is confidential, but some of it, they have to report. Just an FYI. If you aren't a minor, the abuse thing still holds if they have enough information for it to matter, same with the drugs and if you're not 21 probably the same with the alcohol, and they may refer you to a detox program or something of the sort.

Enough of that, now. I'm in Waukesha at the moment, with the fam. Whoopdifreakindo. It's my grandparents' 50th wedding anniversary celebration. My father bought me a new dress and my parents [[mom chipped in]] bought me new shoes. I'll try to put pics up if I can, though in all honesty they'll probably JUST go on myspace and facebook since I don't really use dA for that, unless y'all want it up on here, then just drop me a comment or a note and I'll post here too. =]

I'm still looking for a job. If you have any suggestions and you live in my area [[you know who you are]] drop me a note, gimme a call, let me know.

Well I've got to go help Mama get dressed and get into gear myself, so I'll catch y'all on the flip side. Later!

[link]

^ Watch it! It's fucking amazing! Yay Short Stack Xd ^

M'kay so as soon as I get my tat touched up and it heals, I'll take pics and show all of you. =] I love it, by the way, and think it looks amazing ^^ hehe.

OCTAVIA CALLED ME! WOOT!!!!! She's coming to visit in November, for like 5 days. So, it's going to be awesome, and I can't freaking wait!!!!!!!!! Plus I might get to see V in November as well, which would rock. =] And Octavia's coming back for good in December. WOOTNESSSSS! Hahah anyway.

Well I gotta get going, because I need to go dress shopping, because my grandparents' 50th wedding anniversary is next weekend and my father said I need something that looks good to him, not just to me lol...ttyal =]

M'kay I broke up with StonerBoy, dated PsychoBoy for a week, broke up with him. Now feel like shit and will probably enter into another cycle of boy after boy after boy after boy after boy after boy...you get the point. Whatever.

I'm sick of being people's "only reason to live" or having them "need it to be me." Is this selfish? Maybe. Probably. Whatever. I don't like this emotional responsibility. Especially when I still feel for V, and you know what? I don't even know anymore. If I want a monogomous relationship. Maybe I'm polyamorous. Who knows? God I feel like shit....


I'm going now. bye.